Lawyers Attempt to Squeeze Blood from a Nano

Plastic gets scratched. This is the fact scenario that California lawyers are going to use to sue Apple Computers over a “product defect” in the iPod Nano.

Apple insists that the Nano is made out of the same plastic that full size iPods are manufactured from, so the device should be just as resistant to scratches. has many iPods at its disposal. All of them scratched to hell, well except the Shuffle, but we won’t get into that. However, based upon the strength of claims in the 19 page suit filed in California, we think you should sell all of your Apple stock. To us. For a $1. Trust us, you’ll be thankful when the stock bottoms out and trades 3:1 for shares in Nortel.

On a more serious note, we predict that this lawsuit will last less time than the battery life of a Nano. A 19 page lawsuit is the legal equivalent to the cocktail napkin.

Read where we stole this from. (Kidding)